Paris or Fresno
There's a movie the kids used to watch called Monsters Vs. Aliens or, in kid-speak, Monsters 'n Ellies. It's your typical animated silliness but in the beginning of the movie, the main character, Susan, is talking to her fiance, Derek, who is a news anchor. Derek has been planning their honeymoon to Paris and comes to her just before the wedding with great news. He's taking her somewhere better than Paris!
Really??? What could be better than Paris???
"Fresno!"
"Fresno!" She echos. "In what world is Fresno better than Paris, Derek?"
Well Derek got a job offer in Fresno and they'd have to move there right after the wedding. No Paris. The rest of the movie isn't important but sometimes I find myself worried about Fresno. Not the actual Fresno but the symbol it represents here.
Jesus said he came that we would have life and live it to the full. The abundant life. There are lots of books and sermons and such that have made sure we all know that being a Christian and following Christ does not guarantee an easy life. He isn't a genie or a magician. Ask and you shall receive has some limitations. But the idea of an abundant life is clear. It isn't mere existence. Even in Jeremiah God says "I know the plans I have for you. Plans for good and not to harm you." That all seems to say that He wants our happiness. Our contentment. Our satisfaction. Our joy. He is like any parent who wants to give good gifts to their children. It's why we make such a fuss on Christmas morning. It isn't because I like to play with all of the toys I buy or that I feel like they're a sound financial investment. It's because they like them. Toys bring joy to my children and I love seeing them have so much fun. I think God is the same.
But sometimes I worry that God is like Derek. I'm expecting Paris. God leads me to Fresno. It hasn't really ever happened. At least, not that I can think of. There are lots of areas of my life where I feel like I've got Paris.
My marriage--Paris everyday
My children--totally Paris. Maybe not everyday...
This great adventure of life I'm living--Paris
But what about the areas where I'm still a bride waiting for the honeymoon to start? What about the areas where I'm at the airport, heading to my gate. Am I ticketed on the plane for Paris or the one for Fresno? I know I want Paris (and really I have nothing against Fresno). But is Paris what God has for me?
It's like opening a Christmas gift. One I've been hoping for and dropping hints like crazy for. I see the box. It's got beautiful silver shiny wrapping and a big bow--the kind that's not hard to pull off. I see the giver waiting with anticipation--just KNOWING I'm going to LOVE it. He's so excited to give it to me and can't wait to see my face when I see it.
I pull off the bow--not too quickly. The anticipation is fun. I slide my fingers in between the edges of the paper and tear. Slowly the box is revealed and in it is... underwear.
What?
Underwear.
Hmmm. I look up at the giver. He's so happy. So excited. "Don't you love it?" He asks.
I'm confused. Is he playing a joke? But no--this is the gift. The one he planned for me. The one he was so excited to give me. But it isn't at all what I was expected or hoping for. It's Fresno when I was so sure it was going to be Paris.
I can appreciate underwear. I do need it. It is important. It's not exciting and really, that's ok. It's useful. It has a function. But I'm not excited about it. I'm not rushing up to my room to try it on and see how it fits.
I'm disappointed. I'm grateful for the gift but all of the hype and anticipation I let myself have is now gone. I'm no longer waiting. I'm not going to Paris. I'm here in Fresno.
This is what I'm afraid of. That I pray and wait and pray and wait. I get careful not to get ahead of God. I don't plan out my Paris itinerary. I don't shop for a Paris wardrobe. But everything in my being knows that Paris is coming. Maybe it isn't Paris. Maybe it's Hong Kong! Or Ireland! Or heck even New York City! Somewhere exciting. Somewhere amazing. Somewhere that is most definitely not Fresno.
And yet He gives me Fresno and expects me to be as happy about it as if it were one of those other amazing places.
This hasn't happened, it's just what I worry about as I move through this abundant life and walk out God's path for me. Sometimes I get to a place where I'm unsatisfied or things aren't looking good so I pray about what He wants me to do. My job or where we live or how to navigate something. Where I am is not where I want to be. I feel the fire in my soul that there's something out there for me. Or I'm in a situation where I can not stay still and simply need to walk until God opens a door. I work to align my heart with His will. I pray for His best for me. I pray that His plan is revealed and I'll know what to do.
And I open the package...
What if it's Fresno?
I'm having a hard time accepting that God wants Fresno for me. That's NOT an abundant life. And I don't want to put down roots in Fresno should I find myself there. I never want to stop reaching for Paris. I never want to assume that God's best for me is Fresno (or underwear).
Really??? What could be better than Paris???
"Fresno!"
"Fresno!" She echos. "In what world is Fresno better than Paris, Derek?"
Well Derek got a job offer in Fresno and they'd have to move there right after the wedding. No Paris. The rest of the movie isn't important but sometimes I find myself worried about Fresno. Not the actual Fresno but the symbol it represents here.
Jesus said he came that we would have life and live it to the full. The abundant life. There are lots of books and sermons and such that have made sure we all know that being a Christian and following Christ does not guarantee an easy life. He isn't a genie or a magician. Ask and you shall receive has some limitations. But the idea of an abundant life is clear. It isn't mere existence. Even in Jeremiah God says "I know the plans I have for you. Plans for good and not to harm you." That all seems to say that He wants our happiness. Our contentment. Our satisfaction. Our joy. He is like any parent who wants to give good gifts to their children. It's why we make such a fuss on Christmas morning. It isn't because I like to play with all of the toys I buy or that I feel like they're a sound financial investment. It's because they like them. Toys bring joy to my children and I love seeing them have so much fun. I think God is the same.
But sometimes I worry that God is like Derek. I'm expecting Paris. God leads me to Fresno. It hasn't really ever happened. At least, not that I can think of. There are lots of areas of my life where I feel like I've got Paris.
My marriage--Paris everyday
My children--totally Paris. Maybe not everyday...
This great adventure of life I'm living--Paris
But what about the areas where I'm still a bride waiting for the honeymoon to start? What about the areas where I'm at the airport, heading to my gate. Am I ticketed on the plane for Paris or the one for Fresno? I know I want Paris (and really I have nothing against Fresno). But is Paris what God has for me?
It's like opening a Christmas gift. One I've been hoping for and dropping hints like crazy for. I see the box. It's got beautiful silver shiny wrapping and a big bow--the kind that's not hard to pull off. I see the giver waiting with anticipation--just KNOWING I'm going to LOVE it. He's so excited to give it to me and can't wait to see my face when I see it.
I pull off the bow--not too quickly. The anticipation is fun. I slide my fingers in between the edges of the paper and tear. Slowly the box is revealed and in it is... underwear.
What?
Underwear.
Hmmm. I look up at the giver. He's so happy. So excited. "Don't you love it?" He asks.
I'm confused. Is he playing a joke? But no--this is the gift. The one he planned for me. The one he was so excited to give me. But it isn't at all what I was expected or hoping for. It's Fresno when I was so sure it was going to be Paris.
I can appreciate underwear. I do need it. It is important. It's not exciting and really, that's ok. It's useful. It has a function. But I'm not excited about it. I'm not rushing up to my room to try it on and see how it fits.
I'm disappointed. I'm grateful for the gift but all of the hype and anticipation I let myself have is now gone. I'm no longer waiting. I'm not going to Paris. I'm here in Fresno.
This is what I'm afraid of. That I pray and wait and pray and wait. I get careful not to get ahead of God. I don't plan out my Paris itinerary. I don't shop for a Paris wardrobe. But everything in my being knows that Paris is coming. Maybe it isn't Paris. Maybe it's Hong Kong! Or Ireland! Or heck even New York City! Somewhere exciting. Somewhere amazing. Somewhere that is most definitely not Fresno.
And yet He gives me Fresno and expects me to be as happy about it as if it were one of those other amazing places.
This hasn't happened, it's just what I worry about as I move through this abundant life and walk out God's path for me. Sometimes I get to a place where I'm unsatisfied or things aren't looking good so I pray about what He wants me to do. My job or where we live or how to navigate something. Where I am is not where I want to be. I feel the fire in my soul that there's something out there for me. Or I'm in a situation where I can not stay still and simply need to walk until God opens a door. I work to align my heart with His will. I pray for His best for me. I pray that His plan is revealed and I'll know what to do.
And I open the package...
What if it's Fresno?
I'm having a hard time accepting that God wants Fresno for me. That's NOT an abundant life. And I don't want to put down roots in Fresno should I find myself there. I never want to stop reaching for Paris. I never want to assume that God's best for me is Fresno (or underwear).
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